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Saturday, October 19, 2013

8 Sexy Bikinis Made of Sexy Garbage

Oooh, yeah girl, where did you get that bikini? The dumpster? Nice. That's some really sexy garbage on you. You're dirty, aren't you? Not in the way you're behaving but in the way you are covered in dirt and trash.

Stickers.

Yeah girl, I love it when you peel all those old sticker's out of the activity books from the dentist's office. Or did you get those from the bottom of a skateboard? I bet you did with the way you love grinding. Damn, girl, you're gonna need some Goo Gone. To get all that dirt and sticker residue off your body.
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage

Bottle Caps.

Oh, yeah, looking at you girl makes me think of an old rubbermaid garbage can in a frat basement. The bottom has a big handful of old bottle caps in a fetid pool of molding beer. HOT!
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage

Technology

This babe is totally ROCKIN' the kind of thing you would expect to see in an environmentalism documentary. Girl, any moment now I'm expecting a seagull to swoop in and start pecking at your bangin' bod.
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage
Source: TreeHugger

Fed Ex Box

Oh, yeah, this is the whole package. The whole package that used to include a shirt I ordered as a gift for my grandmother. It sat around in my apartment for a month because I was too lazy to take it down on recycling night four weeks in a row. And, baby, just thinking about that old box in the middle of my filthy room really turns me on.
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage
Source: DrewPops

Dog Hair

Mmmmmmm, when I think of stuff I want to get wet, the first thing I think of is girls, and the second thing I think of is dog hair. The third thing is sweaters. So, yeah, girl, let's pull all this dog hair off theIKEA couch put all three of those things together.
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage
Source: Lagottoaz

Tab Cans

Girl, I wanna get all up inside you, like the jagged edges of these sexy old cans. And like the tetanus shot you'll probably need.
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage
Source: Visible Trash

Guitar Picks

This sexy number is made from the cast-off guitar picks picked off the floor of a mosh-pit, each coated in the blood, sweat, and vomit spewed from a writhing sea of humanity. And, girl, it makes me wanna fuuuuuuuuck.
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage
Source: Equinoctialnyt

CDs

Nothing says steamy like your brother trying to burn his self-recorded &#MY RAPZ#& album, and repeatedly failing due to a corrupted file. He's gonna give that hot-ass shit to his pal Dougie once he figures it out, but until then, let's take the remnants that have gathered dust behind his computer andSLAP THEM ON SOME TITTIES.
8 Bikinis Made of Garbage

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